Whenever we pursue a goal in life, we are no longer in the present moment.
Yet it is there, in the present, that real life takes place. It's the only thing that exists. The future does not yet exist and the past has already disappeared.
The only really interesting time to live is the present moment. And that's usually where you'll find what you're looking for.
There are people who, on the contrary, will tell you that it is absolutely necessary to reach certain goals or accomplish certain things, if you want to be happy and successful.
Try to take a step back from these "tips" to think about them with a clear head and above all decide for yourself.
Maybe you'll have a different opinion on the reviews you've been given after reading this :
Before you start chasing THE dream, make sure it is YOUR dream! You'd be amazed how many people take other people's dreams for their own.
As a result, these people never get what they want because they try to become someone they really aren't.
For example, I have a friend called Anne who spends her days at a job she hates. She became a dental assistant because her mother wanted her to be like her older sister, Sophie.
However, Sophie, followed this path because one day, in college, a young girl sitting next to her said to her “and why not become a dental assistant? .
A few months later, Sophie married a wealthy dentist:she never had to work. As for Anne, she has been practicing this profession for 30 years. Life is played with so little...
Anne has never reinvented herself. And she's not the only one. Many of us don't live the life we really want.
The number one regret people have on their deathbed is that they didn't pursue THEIR dreams. Don't be like them!
If your life is made up of obligations and the dreams of another person live in you, take your courage in both hands and reinvent yourself!
Doing something you REALLY enjoy for a few hours each week can make your life better or even change the course of things. It's as if you gave a new direction to your life.
“In this world, nothing is certain, except death and taxes. –Benjamin Franklin
According to the dictionary, security is "the state of being protected or secure from harm." The problem with the constant search for security is that it doesn't exist!
And if you sell your soul for it, you will definitely regret it.
I have another friend, who is buying a house with a woman he doesn't like and who treats him badly, just to be "warm".
A friend of mine is applying for a job well below her skills just to make sure she gets a stable salary, even though the last time she did that her job made her sick and she had to stay without working for several months.
The truth is that the fear of change and the desire to stay in our comfort zone at all costs hinder our personal development.
Each of us has a purpose in life. However, most of us don't realize this, because we've been forced to conform to someone else's idea of us.
Thrive and take risks if you want to know what really makes your heart beat.
“Follow your passions and the money will come. Chase money and you will never find your passions. –Colin Wright
We all need to make ends meet and treat ourselves once in a while, but chasing money has never made anyone happy.
A Buddhist monk friend told me that most donations for orphanages in third world countries come from wealthy people who feel a great lack in their lives, as if it has no meaning.
Research by psychologist and economist Daniel Kahneman and Princeton economist Angus Deaton has shown that happiness peaks around $70,000 a year. Beyond this sum, happiness no longer has a correlation with money.
Other studies also reveal that people are happier when they spend their money to help other people rather than exclusively on themselves.
Of course, we all need money to live, but pursuing money for money's sake can take you very far from your true passions, from what will fulfill you, and may leave you feeling empty. /P>
Simplify your life, do what you love, think of others and money and happiness will follow.
Many of us think we can be happy having a big house, wearing designer clothes, driving a new car every 5 years, and having more shoes than an entire army.
But in reality, running after material possessions is a way to fill the void in our existence.
Research shows that we are happy when we spend money on positive experiences that leave an imprint on our soul.
It can be a nice show, a vacation rather than interchangeable things like a new sofa or yet another necklace or bag.
So the next time you feel like redecorating your living room or changing your car, consider taking a trip, going to the theater or taking a road trip instead.
“Beware the poverty of a full life. – Socrates
Americans spend the most time at work to accumulate the lowest number of paid holidays of all developed countries.
And those who are lucky enough to still have a job have added an extra day to their work week because now they check their work emails and calls from home.
Is this also what awaits us in France? Are we doomed to inevitably fit in what we couldn't do at work in our free time and leave our private lives aside?
The second regret of those on their deathbed is that they worked too hard and too intensely.
Many scientific studies show that taking breaks throughout the day leads to better productivity than working long hours.
Ditto for holidays:they are necessary for your health and ultimately benefit your professional life. You come back in better shape, able to do more in less time.
So instead of working like crazy and doing more and more in a life that's already too busy to make up for lost time, try slowing down, meditating, doing yoga, taking a walk, chatting with friends, keep a diary and enjoy nature. You will be happier and healthier.
“To have beautiful eyes, look at the beauty in the eyes of others. To have beautiful lips, say only beautiful things and to look good, walk with the certainty that you are never alone. –Audrey Hepburn
Many men and women put a lot of pressure on themselves to look good. Result, we go to the gym, we dye our hair and we even do corrective surgery.
In 2010, 511,000 cosmetic surgery operations took place in France. The problem is that physical beauty fades over time. What we should be running after is inner beauty.
My partner at the gym is a woman in her sixties. And she's one of the most beautiful women I know. She eats well, she takes care of herself and also focuses her attention on people in need to make the world she lives in a better place. She simply shines.
“You are never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream. – C.S. Lewis
We live in a society obsessed with youth:many of us panic when we look in the mirror and see in our reflection our eyelids drooping and gray hair.
Nothing is forever and that's good. When we chase after youth, we often lose sight that with age comes wisdom. We learn from our mistakes, make better choices and be more true to ourselves.
Rather than trying to find the Fountain of Youth, focus your energy on following your heart. It's never too late. Martin P. Levin fulfilled his dream of going to law school at the age of 61. He is still practicing law at 90.
Pierre-Auguste Renoir, crippled by arthritis, continued to paint with a brush attached to his hand. What would you do if you had the courage to know what you are capable of accomplishing, regardless of your age? This is where your true vitality lies.
“Remember that you don't have to explain or prove anything to anyone. If people don't accept you for who you are, then it's time to move on. – Cath B Akesson
Seeking people's approval is a waste of time and energy. What we must seek is our own approval.
The third regret of people on the verge of death is not having had the courage to express their true feelings, not having known how to assume their choices and having buried them in them to preserve the peace around them.
You haven't done anything wrong. Some people just don't like you, or buy into your ideas, that's all. That's not why you have to change.
The second wonderful effect of self-acceptance is that all those little things you wanted to improve about yourself end up changing on their own. Self-hatred holding you back? Self-acceptance will heal you.
" I love my husband. I knew he was my great love because with him I could really be myself. – Idina Menzel, American actress, singer and songwriter.
When you seek love, too ostensibly, you most often attract the wrong people. Most likely you end up with a narcissist who demands constant admiration and attention but gives you nothing in return.
This frantic search for love therefore becomes unhealthy and exhausting. And you end up hurting yourself.
True love comes knocking at your door when you stop looking for it outside of yourself and instead focus on yourself by accepting your flaws and qualities. What can you do to be more authentic and finally accept yourself?
Perhaps you could enroll in an improv theater class, learn to draw, or join a hiking group.
Thus, you will increase the chances of meeting people who share the same ideas as you. When you reveal yourself as you are, rather than hiding, you give love a real opportunity to meet you.
“Don't run after people. Be yourself. Do what you have to do and work hard. The right people – the ones who will truly belong in your life – will come to you. And will stay. –Will Smith
If you're struggling to maintain a relationship or friendship, it's probably best to let that person go. Not all relationships are healthy. Learn to tell the difference.
According to George Simon, author of Sheep’s Clothing , beware of people who try to control you, break your ego to get what they want, lie, ignore you, make you feel guilty, put you down, play the victim or make you doubt yourself.
These "vampires" drain you of your energy. If you honestly assess your current friendships and family members, chances are you'll spot one or two.
Rather than running after them and trying at all costs to maintain these relationships, put some distance between them and you. And get closer to your real friends.
The 4th regret of people who are going to die is that they were too busy to see their friends as much as they would have liked.
A true friend is someone you can turn to for sympathy, advice, support, or a sympathetic ear when you need it, whom you can confide in almost anything, and who you can be yourself with. .
You don't have to run after them because they're already there. Stay in touch with them and give them your full attention.
“Ask yourself what makes you tick, then do it. Because the world needs living people! –Howard Thurman
The consumer societies in which we live encourage us to buy more and more things. So we are always tempted to buy the latest trendy gadget, to follow the latest fashion.
The problem is that if we're always chasing the latest craze, we can lose track of who we really are and what keeps us going.
Another friend of mine, named David, was tired of being a lawyer. He realized what he really wanted was to be a photographer.
He started taking pictures during his lunch break, after work and eventually he managed to sell some. Taking great pictures gives meaning to his life and fills him with joy.
Be a free thinker and reach out to whomever fuels your inner fire. It can be listening to music from the 60s, watching old movies, writing, painting, taking pictures….
And if you do end up buying a new camera, remember that it's the taking of pictures that drives you, not the camera itself.
“I don't need to seek extraordinary moments to find happiness. He is there, right there if I give him my attention and know how to be grateful. –Brene Brown
Chasing happiness by working hard today for rewards tomorrow does not make people happier.
Happiness is a choice. To find it, do what gives you immediate pleasure AND helps you achieve important long-term goals.
The 5th regret of people on their deathbed is that they would have liked to give themselves the choice to be happier. Instead, they got stuck in old patterns they pretended to be content with when they weren't.
Be honest with yourself and develop strategies to be happy doing things you love, every day. This will allow you to achieve a life that truly matches who you are. Be aware of your luck and follow your happiness.
There you go, now you know the 12 things after which you have to stop running to be happy :-)
And you, are you going to try to stop running after these things? Or maybe you know other things to stop chasing after? Tell us what you think in the comments. We can't wait to read you! :-)
