Are you like me and do you feel guilty when you have to make choices? The choice for work, for example, at a specific moment, or the choice to have a telephone conversation instead of playing with your son or daughter? Many mothers, working mothers (self-employed or employed, it does not matter) quickly feel guilty when it comes to making choices. Whether that is business or private.
Do you recognize this when you feel guilty?
- Do I call the mother of a friend to see if she can take my son from school, or do I go and get him myself and then continue working tonight?
- Shall I go to a friend's birthday, to that business networking event or do I grab some me-time?
- Do I take my child to the BSO a few times a week so that I can continue working longer or do I keep him at home, because I work from home?
- Will I help with a certain school activity, or will I spend the time on my own business?
- Do I flop on the couch with my hubby or do I go to work for a few more hours tonight?
Acting out of guilt
Do you also often act 'because it has to be the way' or because you think otherwise that you are 'missed' or 'people' think something of it?
That burden of guilt that you are left with, for example, is something what we tell ourselves and allow ourselves to do. In principle, you determine the limits yourself and what is good or what is not? Men seem to experience much less of this. Have you ever noticed that?
Tips for dealing with guilt
Here are a few tips on how to deal with your guilt:
Clearly indicate your limits to your environment. You will often see that, if you are clear, the 'problem' is much smaller than you think.
- Realize that if you want to grow your business, you also have to make the right choices. That's what a man does, right? Business comes before pleasure so to speak….
- Stop telling yourself that guilt. Those 2 voices in your head… one really has to go. Take yourself seriously, then you radiate that and someone else will too!
- Dare to say no and look around you at women who are already one step further. You will see that there are already enough people in your area who regularly choose for themselves. And why not ?
- Accept that you can't do everything. Ask (and accept) help from someone else to make it easy on yourself.
- Recognize that sometimes choosing your job or your company also offers benefits for the future (eg more salary to do fun things, or the possibility to fully concentrate on your children during the school holidays)
If you'd like to learn more about guilt, read this article on the emotional legacy that may be responsible for it. Pretty interesting!
Do you suffer from guilt and do you want to share that with us? Or do you have additional tips? We'd love to hear from you.
<3 Book More and more fun by Jelle can be found at Bol.com
